I was presenting to a group this past week about the subject of self-awareness. We were discussing how our unconscious negative beliefs (in this specific case we were dealing with guilt) can seriously limit our happiness and relationships.
One delightful woman explained the visceral reaction she experienced to the election of Donald Trump as our new President. I was explaining to the group the discoveries of Sigmund Freud, Carl Jung and other brain science researchers that our emotional triggers to the behavior of another person reveals we are projecting our own unconscious emotional imbalance (guilt) about that specific behavior onto them, in this case Donald Trump.
Observing the negative behavior in another person (perhaps quite accurately) by itself is not a problem. It is our emotionally charged reaction to the behavior that confirms the problem is also in us.
This caught our group off guard. After further introspective discussion, this woman stated that the explanation and discussion had helped her significantly in recovering a peaceful emotional balance and acceptance. She said she realized that when she was teaching (she is now retired), if a student had expressed the bullying and crude behavior that Mr. Trump frequently exhibited, her response would have been one of compassion and forgiveness, understanding that behavior most likely resulted from abuse and conditioning of parents or other adults. She would make every effort to teach him more helpful and satisfying behaviors. She saw Trump’s behavior from an entirely new and benign perspective.
By bringing to the surface and letting go of her own deep-seated emotionally charged belief around this behavior, she felt a complete resurgence of compassion, acceptance and understanding. It was a wonderful relief as her natural optimism returned.
This was a wonderful outcome that proved uplifting to the entire group. It showed everyone how quickly and dramatically limiting unconscious beliefs and perceptions can be unpackaged and disassembled when feedback and simple self-awareness practices are applied.
Coaching of this sort, either individually or in groups very often eliminates difficult and frustrating feelings that are at the root of problems, failures and dissatisfaction. If you would like to discover how this work could be transformative for you, please contact us.
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