SELF-AWARENESS: Who Am I, Really?

So often we find ourselves reacting completely out of character. Unfortunately, we reflect on that behavior just after the damage has been done rather than just before. Don’t we sometimes wish that we had that “delete” button to push just like we use to save us from our potentially disastrous emails?

The great benefit in building up our self-awareness skills is that we both strengthen our positive beliefs, perceptions and assumptions and we tend to dismantle many of our unhelpful or limiting ones. Here coaching and mentoring relationships are so valuable since they provide the feedback that allows us observe our behaviors more accurately, focusing on turning positive beliefs and behaviors into habits, and eliminating many of our most unhelpful or damaging perceptions, assumptions and habits.

One of my most damaging beliefs, programmed into me unintentionally by my mother when I was about two years old, resulted in behaviors that highlighted my lack of self-confidence at very inopportune times in my adult life. I was in my late forties before I even realized what was behind this most unfortunate behavior, and it required another five years of intensive coaching work to completely uproot it. I may have minor residual consequences resulting from this belief in the future, but they will be minor inconveniences.

Here is the heart of the matter. The more reactionary we behave, the less aware of our deeper conflicting beliefs, perceptions and expectations we are. Our effectiveness and abilities suffer because we are blind to these limitations.

The worst part of this for our own happiness is we can’t observe our behavior accurately and dispassionately when we are being victimized by our emotional reactions. When are our emotions most frayed and scattered? Yes, I can hear your answer…when you are under the greatest stress, when it is most important to keep our emotions in check.

I can’t urge too strongly the importance of improving self-awareness. There are many wonderful tools to helps accomplish this, and the freedom we feel from gaining self-awareness is truly incomparable.

Frustration and Stress can be a distant memory.  Live with confidence, optimism and peace of mind.  Click HERE to learn how.